I went for a run this morning, came back to check the news and saw that the Supreme Court had declared DOMA unconstitutional. Marta and I were at that very moment having a disagreement about the names of the Marx Brothers. I went to look up their names and got distracted by the news: “Hey look!” I said. “We’re married federally now.”
She said: “Oh that’s great.”
Then she pointed out the Wikipedia page that showed I had been wrong about the Marx brothers.
Which somehow seemed perfect. Marriage is, after all, a big ol’ bundle of intangible and tangible things, including (at least for some of us) love, sex, Marx brother debates, long walks, washing the bathtub while the other one empties the dishwasher, going camping, playing Scrabble, taking each other for granted, vowing never to take each other for granted, watching the baby while the other sleeps, sleeping side-by-side, being nice to in-laws, remembering (or forgetting) anniversaries, opening joint bank accounts, sharing books, making vacation plans, cooking dinner, going on picnics, going into debt, anticipating certain conversation topics, memorizing the wording of certain well tread stories, kissing, fighting over who gets the last chip, watching Hitchcock films, creating a private Facebook group titled “Our Team,” Skyping across borders, compromising on the apartment’s thermostat setting, and yes, having rights.
Happy federal marriage, honey.
And, considering we got married in the first place so I could adopt you, Nico, a happy one to you too:
This is her at her first picnic, which we took last Sunday. It has nothing to do with gay marriage, except that we were both exhausted that day and feeling stir-crazy after spending so much time in the house with a newborn and then we had the idea of going to an estate sale followed by a picnic. By accident, we ended up at the park where we’d gone on our first date, one summer day just about four years ago.
Here are a few more from that day.